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Laughter Is The Best Medicine GAW , " The Slasher"

Glenn Jul 12, 2015

  1. Glenn

    Glenn Sol Invictus Knife Maker or Craftsman

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    This GAW should be an easy one .

    You may not have any REDS if you want to participate, meaning you must be a member in good standing.

    You must have at least 25 posts.

    You MUST Post something FUNNY !, make a Clown laugh FUNNY ! :bwah:


    You can post ever 2hrs, you can post for other members as well. :manganr:

    This GAW will run till Thursday the 16th and close at midnight, I will run a random number generator to select a winner.

    So what is "The Slasher" ?

    It's a Damascus Ring Knife I crafted !

    It's man size at a 13. :devilzeek :madaddy:

    Not to worry, if your fingers are a bit smaller, you can pinch it at the depressions. :devilwag:


    [​IMG]

    It's not razor sharp, but sure will leave a mark. :madaddy:

    Let the games begin ! :thumbsup:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 12, 2015
  2. begreen61

    begreen61 Deadicated JDBA Official Member Brigade Member

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    Lets do this sounds fun

    A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."

    One down.:manganr:

    Thanks glenn
     
  3. xris_coke

    xris_coke Average member

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    Blowing Chunks

    Guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for anything but a Budweiser. Bartender says "Now I have to know why not Budweiser?" but the guy only says you won't understand. The bartender says "Try me" so, the guy says "well last week I drank a 12 pack of Bud and got so drunk I blew Chunks." The bartender laughs and says thats normal. And the guy says "See… I told you that you wouldn't understand, Chunks is my Dog!"
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 13, 2015
    begreen61 likes this.
  4. Blastermaster

    Blastermaster Huge member

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    An Italian Wedding

    In the year 1935, an old man was married to a beautiful young woman in venice. They started home after the wedding on the old man's donkey cart, with his stubborn donkey pulling it. The donkey walked about 25 feet before stopping. The old man got out of the cart and yells at the donkey, making it move again. Saying to the donkey as it begins to move "Thats a one". After another 50 feet the donkey stops again, prompting the old man to whack it with a board and say "Thats a two". After 100 or so feet, the donkey stops a third time. The old man then shoots the donkey with his shotgun and says "And thats a three". The new bride yells at the old man for killing their only means of transportation. The old man then looks at her and says "Thats a one"
     
    begreen61 likes this.
  5. crogers

    crogers Magnus advocatus diaboli Super Moderator Brigade Member

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    This one always makes me laugh...


    [​IMG]
     
    begreen61 likes this.
  6. begreen61

    begreen61 Deadicated JDBA Official Member Brigade Member

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    This is for dymond47 Plus Good Morning JD

    Sky Pilot ,How high can you fly ,You never ,never Reach the sky,,,too funny.

    My Joke for D,

    The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?" Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'" :devilwag:
     
  7. buddy

    buddy Slide to unlock JDBA Official Member

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    So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forget the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.
     
    GEEZER likes this.
  8. buddy

    buddy Slide to unlock JDBA Official Member

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    [​IMG]
     
  9. knateknife

    knateknife JDBA4L JDBA Official Member

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    A man walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his pants, and a parrot sitting upon the steering wheel.
    He orders a drink.
    As the bartender is pouring the drink he asks, "hey, whats wit the parrot?"
    And the man responds, " I don't know, but he's driving me nuts!"
    :manganr:
     
    begreen61 likes this.
  10. Ryanol

    Ryanol SnarkMasterFunkyFresh JDBA Official Member

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    heres some dad humor...If you've been a dad or had a dad; you've heard some version of it.

    How to catch a bear.
    Step 1. Go out onto the frozen lake and drill out a large hole.
    Step 2. Line the edge of the hole with frozen peas
    Step 3. Now when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the icehole.
     
    begreen61 likes this.
  11. Blastermaster

    Blastermaster Huge member

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    There was once a bad magician on a cruise ship, who performed in the main hall. At every show, there would be the captain with his pet parrot, Dave. During the show, the parrot would yell out the trick, and ruin the show. After months of this, the magician tries to kill the bird. He yells "Dammit Dave!" and shoots at the bird. The bullet misses and hits a propane tank and explodes the whole ship. All that is left is the magician and the bird sitting on a floating piece of wood. The bird then looks at the magician and says "You got me, where's the damn ship?"
     
  12. Berkley

    Berkley Ancient Life Form Brigade Member

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    On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife.

    The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation that was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man, and wondered what he was in for.

    The medicine man slowly, methodically produced a potion, handed it to him, and with a grip on his shoulder, warned, 'This is powerful medicine. It must be respected. You take only teaspoonful, and then say '1-2-3.' When you do that, you will become manlier than you have ever been in your life, and you can perform as long as you want." The old man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,'" he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until next full moon."

    The old man was very eager to see if it worked so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!"

    Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes, and then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"

    And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 13, 2015
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  13. buddy

    buddy Slide to unlock JDBA Official Member

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    Saul is working in his store when he hears a booming voice from above: "Saul, sell your business." He ignores it. It goes on for days. "Saul, sell your business for $3 million." After weeks of this, he relents, sells his store. The voice says ‘Saul, go to Las Vegas." He asks why. "Saul, take the $3 million to Las Vegas." He obeys, goes to a casino. Voice says, "Saul , go to the blackjack table and put it down all on one hand." He hesitates but knows he must. He’s dealt an 18. The dealer has a six showing. "Saul, take a card." What? The dealer has -- "Take a card!" He tells the dealer to hit him. Saul gets an ace. Nineteen. He breathes easy. "Saul, take another card." What? "TAKE ANOTHER CARD!" He asks for another card. It’s another ace. He has twenty. "Saul, take another card," the voice commands. I have twenty! Saul shouts. "TAKE ANOTHER CARD!!" booms the voice. Hit me,Saul says. He gets another ace. Twenty one. The booming voice goes: "un-fucking-believable!"
     
    begreen61 likes this.
  14. forbes617

    forbes617 Huge member

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    Clean jokes aren't as fun, but...

    What do you call Batman when he skips church?

    Christian Bale.

    [​IMG]

    Thanks for the chance Glenn.
     
    begreen61 likes this.
  15. xris_coke

    xris_coke Average member

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    What does an 80 year old womans junk taste like?

    Depends
     
  16. buddy

    buddy Slide to unlock JDBA Official Member

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    coral!!.jpg
     
  17. GEEZER

    GEEZER Beware The Ides of March Brigade Member

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    [YOUTUBE]zSi-yCV-gQ4[/YOUTUBE]
     
  18. BaliAction

    BaliAction Level: True Devil

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    This is tough...

    Glenn your a wiener :bwah:

    :thumbsup:
     
  19. Blastermaster

    Blastermaster Huge member

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    What do you call a comedian who has no funny jokes?

    A politician
     
  20. Glenn

    Glenn Sol Invictus Knife Maker or Craftsman

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    Have till midnight folks. :devilcorn:
     

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