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I need to Explain

Ronin0821 Apr 13, 2015

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  1. Ronin0821

    Ronin0821 JDBA4L JDBA Official Member

    So some people may think certain things about me and the way my behavior has been on the JD has not fully been me. Please I would just like to say this. Why, because this is one place that I always like to be I haven't really liked to be involved in much except the JD and the knife scene its totally me and knives is my only passion. So I would like to explain why I just pretty much went away. Also this might fill in why I was being a retart alot of times.

    I have been addicted to drugs heavily that has changed my life for a long time now. As you all seen i had up to 60 balisongs all of high quality that I sold. Because i was always late on bills or i needed my next fix. These past few weeks that I disappeared i have been trying to put this behind me and get clean. It has been a really rough journey and a very crazy life lesson.

    I have learned alot and i have seen which friends i do have after this big step in life. Today i can finally say i am clean and would like to get back to my normal life and fix alot of things that i have messed up along the way. Also hopefully show you the real Tim Riley. I have never been here sober so it will be different pretty much everyday has been different.

    I found myself at rock bottom and these past few months pretty much showed my family what has been going on. So i pushed real hard to wake up and finally say im clean and moving in the right direction. So I would like to start over here as myself and not someone that im not anymore.

    I dont expect the people that i owe anything to or the people that i have hurt or pissed off to forgive me. I just hope ypu can give the real Tim just a fair chance. I am just looking to get back to reality and be back on JD. I am saying this now because i think its the right time and i would like people to know that yes i might of fucked up with some of you but pretty much i honestly dont even remember . I regret selling alot of my knives i had opeoblems f a collection but those are things i will have to live with.

    I would like to give a few thanks to a few guys here: Mack22 brother you checked up on me every weekend and talked to me you made me open myself up to telling someone whats going on.

    C.M.F.T.W brother your just like a brother to me you told me over and over and had so much faith in me and the trust we have for one another is so great. I want to say thank you for the past few weeks of advice that you have given me. Without you showing me what I can turn out to be who knows where i would be.

    Lastly Matt Cook: Matt we talked once about this because i have been hiding in a shell with this problem but those few hours you showed me what i am doing to my family and myself it was definitely tough love l. But to have you as a friend that gets down to the real deal with out bullshitting around it thank you for what you said to me and my wife. That night really changed my life it meant alot to me. Thank all of you for all the help.

    Im sorry JD that i have been the way i was im hoping to change that and fix my reputation because since i have signed up here it hasnt been me honestly. So i hope i can fix a few problems here and start over again as a sober normal person.

    Thank you for reading this its very hard to come out and say these things but its finally time.
    Bulldozer likes this.
  2. RazorSharp

    RazorSharp RZRSHRPDVL Brigade Member

  3. TopHat

    TopHat Drivin' that train..... Brigade Member

    Is it Groundhog Day....again....?
  4. waterdogs

    waterdogs Brigade Member Brigade Member

    Will the real Slim Shady please stand up

    (Please stand up....please stand up)
  5. OnceBitten

    OnceBitten Momma said I'd go blind Brigade Member

    April Fool!
  6. Glenn

    Glenn Sol Invictus Knife Maker or Craftsman


  7. Mpsecare

    Mpsecare Owl Man

    Go to rehab man.
  8. AJD1

    AJD1 Prince Of Darkness Brigade Member


  9. D2AP

    D2AP Better than gold or platinum

    "These past few weeks that I disappeared i have been trying to put this behind me and get clean. It has been a really rough journey and a very crazy life lesson."

    "Today i can finally say i am clean."

    Are you trying to tell us you got clean in a a few of weeks?

    Sounds like bullshit.

    I come from a family with a long history of drug and alcohol abuse (my parents were the exception to my the family legacy). Not a single person in my family magically got clean in a matter of weeks. It took a very long time and relapses happen.

    It is hard for me not to just say that I think you're full of shit.

    However, on the off chance you're being serious and honest for a change. Go get some help.
  10. Blastermaster

    Blastermaster Huge member

    Whatever the reason for the situation you find yourself surrounded in you can work your way out of it. If you improve upon yourself and don't let down any of us, if you truly have turned over a new leaf, we will eventually let you back into the tribe if you will.
    Closing up, let me leave you with a quote from John Gotti. "I never lie because I don't fear anyone. You only lie when you're afraid" The only question that is left is do you fear the judgment of your past actions.
  11. EOD13

    EOD13 Balisong Addict JDBA Official Member

  12. gpd215

    gpd215 Brigade Member Brigade Member

    This is exactly what I thought when I read it.

    Tells us what kind of 'drugs' you were hooked on?
  13. waterdogs

    waterdogs Brigade Member Brigade Member

    Ibuprofin and Preparation H....
    papercut, Amotek and gpd215 like this.
  14. Ronin0821

    Ronin0821 JDBA4L JDBA Official Member

    I will talk about what i was hooked on when things are better in my life i am in the process of turning things around and trying to do better for my family. But i see this place havent changed a bit. I just wanted to come out and day something since i havent been around. I just didnt get up and leave things just got bad. I respect the JD and i have been here for awhile I just wanted to say why i have been gone and also why maybe i was the way i was since i have stopped doing the shit.

    Life has had a different meaning and feeling. Flipping while sober is a little different but at least im sober and happy. I just wanted to say why i havent been here and that i cant wait to come back when things are fully good my life is stable.

    I do have some knives i would like to show that are coming my way. Thats about it but some of you will still be dicks but some of you that were friends i just wanted you to know why i juSt disappeared. Im not looking for any problems this is the first time i have said anything about this and i would like to just look at it as a step in the right direction.
  15. fod

    fod Hand of the Box Master Knife Maker or Craftsman


  16. Clydetz

    Clydetz Forever straight and true Brigade Member

    Do what you gotta do to get right, dude. I understand why you're posting on the JD but a lot of us have had some bad times too. I come to the JD for happy news & knife talk. All my best to you & the family.

    THEONEANDONLY Drunk on the Blood of Saints JDBA Official Member

    Good luck to you Tim, I'm glad you are turning your life around. I've seen many a lives, relationships, and careers wrecked because of the scourge of marijuana...

    All da best...

  18. Ronin0821

    Ronin0821 JDBA4L JDBA Official Member

    Dude WEED really first thank you and weed im smoking weed to calm down shit i was doing real hard shit weed i have smoked forever. I do not consider that a drug nor addictive i stopped smoking weed all the time. The shit i was doing has killed pretty much everyone i know and has done serious damage to alot of people but i do appreciate everything thank you.
  19. Ronin0821

    Ronin0821 JDBA4L JDBA Official Member


    Yes me too i come here for the same but i dissapeared and their has been a few bumps in the road here so i just wanted to clear a few things up. So i can enjoy the knife talk lol. Gary its nice to here from you hope all is well. Probably see you at one of the meets when things are better. Right now im not big on going places lol.
  20. J Ray

    J Ray Formerly Morpho JDBA Official Member

    Just to clarify, you have knives coming your way but you still can't pay your debt? And this is you trying to change? I have been waiting to hear from you for weeks, but not a word. And then this thread appears? Wow, glad to see you've changed... :devilroll:

    *I'm a recovering addict too, but I pay what I owe
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 13, 2015
    D2AP and Toni like this.
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