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Fucking angel soft crappy toilet paper....

Krull Dec 14, 2015

  1. Towelie

    Towelie The JD: Don't Forget To Bring A Towel Brigade Member

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    I have seen bidet seats come up on woot.com from time to time. they are normally around $280 IIRC. it's not really my thing, but knock yourself out.
     
    Kelper likes this.
  2. ratstuph

    ratstuph Hoodoo Operator Super Moderator

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    Stay away from my feet you fucking pervs you!
     
  3. ded i

    ded i Friend of The Devil Lady Devil

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    The spray toilets seem unsanitary. What sprays up then rains down and the funny little receding nozzle would be a 'dirt' magnet. :paper:

    Bidets clean easily and serve an astonishing variety of sexy & unsexy functions. :madaddy:

    I've used bidets since I lived in Europe many years ago. Xrayzebra laughed at first but he has bidets installed whenever we move. :manganr:

    Like heated car seats, once you have one you never want to go without.
     
    Kelper and GEEZER like this.
  4. Charlie Mike

    Charlie Mike paranoid nutjob Brigade Member

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    [​IMG]
     
  5. Krull

    Krull Legit Crybaby/Drama QUEEN

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    No matter what you sick fuckers say I can tell you this:

    I've never had any problems with rough TP,in fact I've always had the opposite problem in that any TP that is touted as the softest,fluffiest,most pamper your bottom ever is absolute shit at the job it's meant to do-wipe the shit off your asshole :balrog: my finger is the least of my worries with that type,I've had my whole fucking hand covered in shit thanks to some fru-fru TP! :evilglow: worse when you get the shits and the TP basically disintegrates on contact with liquid....

    I buy the cheap Kroger brand thousand sheets to a roll TP and at least it's sturdy enough to wipe the dingle berries off and not shred and leave my fingers smelling funny.

    Oh and a quick FYI if you ever find yourself with no TP those plastic bags from the store work fine as emergency ass wipes.
     
  6. fod

    fod Hand of the Box Master Knife Maker or Craftsman

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    To our resident Mr Whipple

    :unintroduced:

    [​IMG]




     
    Kelper likes this.
  7. GEEZER

    GEEZER Beware The Ides of March Brigade Member

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    Fuck!

    I've got more hair on my ass than most you mutha fuckas got on your body...

    Come back later when it takes a half roll to get "commando clean"...:unintroduced:
     
    Kelper likes this.
  8. Kelper

    Kelper Penguin Egg Eater Lady Devil

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    Back in my day if we got caught short, we looked for a handful of grass, god help us if we found doc leaves. You young ones have it so good.

    Rosie :devilwag:
     
    crogers and GEEZER like this.
  9. zogglet

    zogglet Better than Nutella Administrator Lady Devil JDBA Official Member

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    Just when I thought this thread couldn't get any more graphically descriptive.... :bwah:
     
    ded i likes this.
  10. gzb

    gzb SUPER Moderator* Super Moderator

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    Get change for a five... :unintroduced:
     
    tubtar likes this.
  11. TopHat

    TopHat Drivin' that train..... Brigade Member

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    I'll bet you're really popular at the strip clubs..........
     
  12. Krull

    Krull Legit Crybaby/Drama QUEEN

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    Well now we know why they say money is a wonderful germ vector.

    Thanks you sicko :devilfinger: :bwah::bwah:
     
  13. tubtar

    tubtar high caliber consecrator Moderator Super Moderator Brigade Member

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    Yeah.........but not by him. :jdwink2::manganr:
    Back to the story........did this hotel have a number on the sign by any chance ?
    Price or name.........don't matter.
    You're paying for that free wi-fi one way or another.
    At the nicer joints , they supply a 180 grit for clean up and a 400 grit for finish.
    And they wad up the end of the roll to make it look like a fucking clam shell.
    What can I tell you ............. it's a pure joy to crack off a log in these joints. Blade 2012 001.jpg
     
  14. Kelper

    Kelper Penguin Egg Eater Lady Devil

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    Thankful that this is a no name independent hotel. I don't need to make clamshells. If it's hanging I just neaten up the rolls.
    Rosie
     
    crogers likes this.
  15. GODDESS OF VENGEANCE

    GODDESS OF VENGEANCE Crazy Bitch Lady Devil Super Moderator

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    :ropeman:

    :devilcorn:


    :bobert:
     
  16. ded i

    ded i Friend of The Devil Lady Devil

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    Toilet Museum Exhibition :ssmile:

    'You too can become feces'

    [video=youtube;SyEeUUyQeYU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyEeUUyQeYU[/video]
     
  17. tubtar

    tubtar high caliber consecrator Moderator Super Moderator Brigade Member

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    They had me at " poo shaped hats ". :bwah::bwah::bwah:
     
  18. Towelie

    Towelie The JD: Don't Forget To Bring A Towel Brigade Member

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    Pretty classy. I am thinking opening day at Del Mar. I can probably find one on Ebay.
     

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