It's just a dream , right ?

**tubtar** · 05-12-2008, 09:15 PM

It has to be........... I was sleeping.
And though I lead an exciting and star studded life , this was just too over the top to have been real.
I was visiting Ded I and Xray .............. not too wierd, I've done this before......... but I was with my family ( parents ) and wondering how to reign in our dysfunction and keep things civil.
People kept drifting in and out.......people I know.
It was getting social.
We were playing pool on Ded I and X's table in the basement.........the one they don't have.
It was suspiciously familiar........like the table in the basement at my parents house circa 1985.
In one corner pocket was bars like a jail cell and incarcerated within were none other than Chuck Norris and a couple other Hollywood stars I don't quite recall.
Well , they were making noise and basically fucking up my concentration while I was shooting........... so I sprung them.
As they were leaving the basement .......... and complaining , no less ....... the fucking ingrates.......... Randy " macho man " Savage was coming in the sliding glass door and bitching that I let them out.
I was torn between asking him for an autograph and telling him " Hey , we're shooting a game here ! "
Then I woke up.
No , I wasn't on drugs.
J.S.

**ded i** · 05-12-2008, 09:20 PM

I assure you Chuck Norris is not locked up in our basement

... but now I'm sceered to go down there ...

Please come back so we can make more dreams/memories

**xrayzebra** · 05-12-2008, 10:17 PM

We both nearly pissed ourselves reading this one.

Well, ~I~ nearly pissed myself... ded i actually DID. She's laughing and moaning, "OH, I'm gonna do it again!" as I out her on this.

So, are you saying they were in jail IN the corner POCKET? Like, they were real small? Or were they life sized and up on the table? Y'know, even though we don't have a pool table, we still have house rules about pool table behavior. No, gettin' on the table! Jeez!

Fucking Chuck Norris. Did I ever tell the story of him ripping off the script of "Side Kicks?" I took script writing from the same professor who taught the author of Side Kicks how to write scripts. (That's why I never had a career in the movies.)

This is how I heard the story - I have no way to know if it is true, but it sounds like poetic justice anyway.

This guy let Norris see the script, cuz he actually wrote it for Norris, and Norris said he was turning it down, but kept it and then turned around and MADE the movie without buying it and tried to stiff the author.

The guy who wrote it won his lawsuit, and Norris had to pay him a flat fee for stealing it. The funny thing is, the movie was such a miserable flop that if the guy who wrote it had gotten the standard contract with a percentage of the proceeds, he would have hardly made a dime.

Instead, since Norris got busted for trying to steal it, he had to pay the guy more money than if he had done the honest deal to start with.

Now, that might have been totally untrue. I dunno. A quick Google returns nothing. I don't think I wanna piss that guy off. It was probably a vicious rumor, without any merit.

**Bruce** · 05-12-2008, 10:36 PM

I don't know ded i and zebra. Nobodys seen Chuck Norris lately.

G3 · 05-12-2008, 10:53 PM

Don't eat Slim Jim before bed.

**Clydetz** · 05-12-2008, 11:19 PM

Rack 'em and play double or nuthin'!

I think your cue is bent, tubtar!

**norcal13** · 05-13-2008, 01:24 AM

W.T.F ? did you fall asleep with a nicotine patch on?

**mack1** · 05-13-2008, 11:33 AM

Inever did have any strange dreams while on "The Patch", unfortunately.
Same with no fucking buzz from all the morphine I take either!

Now, can y'all imagine what kinda dreams T would have if he was on the stuff I'm on???

**Katwyld** · 05-13-2008, 03:17 PM

And I thought I had strange dreams... I think ya beat all of my doozies, TT... Congrats! hehehe

**Medium John** · 05-13-2008, 03:24 PM

wow, macho man... OooooooooooooooooohhYEAHHHHH!!!!!!

MJ

**Sean H** · 05-13-2008, 04:10 PM

you DID all have your clothes on, didn't ya???

...cuz in ALL my dreams EVERYONES nekked.

...I don't wanna talk about the one with Ron in....it makes me nervous.

**tubtar** · 05-13-2008, 10:12 PM

Naw , man ......... they were full sized.
John Turturro and I think Madonna , but I am struggling to remember just who was in there.
There was bars in the back of the pocket and Chuck was waving his hands to get my attention and asking me to let them out.
I was lining up a shot in that corner and he was bugging the fuck out of me.
I walked around to the side of the table and opened a door that went beneath the floor and out they walked.
I used to have some great dreams on the patch..........James Bond shit.
I'd wake up exhausted after a hard night of saving the world.
There was much running and gun play..........and I never lost.
It was great.
I tend to have pretty vivid dreams anyway.
J.S.