Vons = Safeway

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Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle aged couple and a young,
newlywed couple wanted to join a church.

The pastor says, "We have special requirements for new parishioners.
You must abstain from having sex for two weeks." The couples agreed
and came back at the end of two weeks.

The pastor goes to the elderly couple and asks, "Were you able to
abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The old man replies, "No problem
at all, Pastor." "Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the
pastor.

The pastor goes to the middle aged couple and asks, "Well, were you
able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?" the man replied, "The
first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch
for a couple of nights but, yes we made it."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the church," said the pastor.

The pastor then goes to the newlywed couple and asks, "Well, were you
able to abstain from sex for two weeks?" "Well Pastor, we were not
able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young man replied.

"What happened?" inquired the pastor. The man said, "My wife was
reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf and dropped it. When she
bent over to pick it up, I was over come with lust and took advantage
of her right there."

"You understand of course, this means you will not be welcome in our
church," stated the pastor.

"That's OK," said the young man, "We're not welcome at Vons anymore
either."