Match.com

[Clydetz]

Wasn't that Cat Stevens Cly????

Wasn't that Jimmy Buffet OnlyNewKnives????

You guys forget who you're talkin' to? In 1963 I was a sophmore in high school...

[Clydetz]

I did. I got a wink alert from someone named Ron (a.k.a Renee) who said (s)he was a moderator at JerzeeDevil.....which is how I found this place........

Where did you take your winking 'match' on your first date?

[TopHat]

Where did you take your winking 'match' on your first date?

To the park, so (s)he could meat Dillon...........

[AJD1]

I knew i wasn't imagining it..

In 63 i was 1 Cly,but by 8 i loved Cat Stevens..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLeWB3C2cLo

[hamburger]

i only remember that Jimmy Buffet sang if he can not get a girl then he is going back to key west town.

[Clydetz]

Three unanswered e-mails out there... just need one lady to answer and I'll be sipping coffee, getting lost in her eyes!

[hamburger]

Three unanswered e-mails out there... just need one lady to answer and I'll be sipping coffee, getting lost in her eyes!

You got the sweet talk about you Gary. It's no wonder the ladies love you.

[Clydetz]

So... while waiting for an e-mail to happen, I wrote another rhyme.

Max


It was May of 1999 and I was busy on the phone.
John, a co-worker, hunts me up and says…
‘Got one for you Clydetz… just want it to be known.
He’s been twice around the building and looking lost’

That alerts everyone in the office to this little dog’s plight
and all run outside to try and catch the rascal.
He runs all over the place showing no signs of fright.
He’s playing a game of ‘catch me if you can!’

One employee offers him some of his lunch…
the‘lost’ little pooch seems to enjoy ham and cheese.
And while this white haired dog is enjoying it a bunch,
I gently persuade him to get into my truck.

No one can keep him so the task falls to me.
Mr.Dog Lover has two dogs at home… what’s one more?
I’m doing the math in my head and I’m sure two plus one equals three.
I sure do hope Bonnie and Clyde will accept this guy.

I introduced this energetic bundle to the 2 dog pack as ‘Max’.
They all sniffed noses and had their tails a-waggin’.
But then Bonnie and Clyde raised the hair on their backs!
Heads went down and I heard some growling.

‘Max’was taken out through the garage for a short walk
so Bonnie and Clyde could calm down from the encounter.
I felt sorry for ‘Max’ and gave him a soft talk.
For almost five months this ‘not getting along’ continued.

I decided I’d have to try and find ‘Max’ a new place.
It took me two attempts to find a good home for ‘Max’
but a family of three came over and gave ‘Max’ an embrace.
The young girl asked if she could walk ‘Max’ around the park.

She did this 5 different times to be sure ‘Max’ was the one.
When she brought ‘Max’ back, I offered him a treat.
He sat up on his haunches and made it look like fun.
‘Wow’…said the girl, can I try that?

I gave her a dog treat and she asked ‘Max’ to sit up.
He ignored her high pitched voice completely.
She felt bad and asked… ‘What’s wrong with the pup?’
I told her that maybe he’s used to my deeper voice.

I gave her another dog treat and told her to try it once more.
I cracked up when this young girl said in her deepest voice…
‘Sit up, ‘Max’…he did and her mouth nearly hit the floor!
Her mother and father were laughing as well.

That pretty much sealed the deal as they went to the table
to sign all the paperwork as ‘Max’s’ new family.
I picked up ‘Max’s’ possessions as fast I was able
so ‘Max’ would have some familiar toys, blanket and stuff.

I gave the leash to the young girl while shaking her hand.
‘Max’ looked confused but I knew it was for the best.
Off to their car they all went looking so grand!
It was a great sight… I felt a few tears running down my cheek.

(I checked on ‘Max’ one year later. He was still amazing his new family with his tricks.)

Clydetz 11/9/2011

[RNST]

Dear Abby,

I got into an awkward conversation yesterday. I was talking to a woman about what side of the bed she preferred to sleep on. I said I preferred the right hand side and she said she preferred the top. What could it mean?

Clydetz

well let's break it down for you Clydetz

She may be accustomed to hiding under the bed when the S O came home so she was establishing her first preference.

Or she may be looking for a male roommate who happens to have bunk beds.

Or you may have struck gold and she wants your body

Funny thread you started here

[tubtar]

All I know is if you really want to weed out the scammers and the gold diggers , when you fill our the initial questionnaire and they ask " What do you like most in a woman ? " , answer with " my dick ".

[Clydetz]

Damn... I must have missed that question!

[hamburger]

A few years ago when that site started it was free. It said answer the questions the most correct way so you will get the best results. So I answered it that way. When it was over it said there is no one for you. You are impossible. So I got my perfect match my dog.

[Clydetz]

Well all I can say is it's been a week and I'm still waiting to buy my 1st cup of coffee! I'm a patient man but the hell with the coffee... we're going for drinks now!

[begreen61]

Well all I can say is it's been a week and I'm still waiting to buy my 1st cup of coffee! I'm a patient man but the hell with the coffee... we're going for drinks now!

That a boy Gary get 'em drunk,old school dateing 101

[hamburger]

dogs always get the women. they love dogs. now i know why you got Casper