this was the best joke I heard in awhile

[ericsgreen]

Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Martin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!"

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Martin asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious, broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."

Confused, Martin asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh, that! Mum dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your trousers off, you said, "Lady, leave me alone! I'm married!"

:eric:

[Danbo]

Not bad, but I like this one.


What is the gay computer programmer's favorite DOS command?


c : enter ###

[Wolfgang]

A Russian, A Canadain, and a Jamaican are on a boat.

The Russian throws a texas mickey of vodka off the edge..
"In Russia we have lots of vodka"

The Jamaican throws a pound of ganja off the edge...
"In Jamaican mon, we have lots of sess!"

The Canadain runs down the boat, grabs the closest Arab and throws him overboard...
"In Canada we have lot's of ragheads eh?"

[Fenlore]

great joke wolf, cept the canadian guy woulda jumped over board to save the booze before throwin over the towelhead.

[ericsgreen]

I think the canadian guy wouldve saved the sess AND booze...AFTER throwing the bastard overboard, :lol: budbuddy.biz

I want to see wolfies original joke:flag: I cant think of anything off color... ****a should not be blanked out, Im black I can say ****a without getting bleeped, like obb can say ***got without getting bleeped :oops: :D: :tbg:


Is it patriotic yet to make racist remarks about these fucking terrorists? :idunno: :lol::flag: :lol: :wolfgang:

[Pumpkin]

Did you just say you're black?

[ericsgreen]

:jerkit2:

[Pumpkin]

I don't get it?

:picsor:

[ericsgreen]

:jerkit2: = blonde with blew I's :lol:...Im not black, it was from southpark...well, I thought it was funny as hell :lol:

[Wolfgang]

Is it patriotic yet to make racist remarks about these fucking terrorists? :idunno: :lol::flag: :lol: :wolfgang:

[cutting apart rant to masses]

Yes, but I'm not the most patriotic. A nation is the state, the state is an assest to the system known as society which is what I hate because human beings were never ment to be on such a large scale. No natural selection = Over population of DUMB and BRAINWASHED humans of all races and genders. When you realize that as a whole people are fucking stupid, Perhaps this is a sign you actually think for yourself.

And for taking shots at Arabs, Islamic, and their bullshit and fundamentalism, it's not selective... I hate it because I hate religion just as much as the society it has raped since it's birth. And and Islamic society is much worse then ours, no matter how much I like to bash all society.

[/end rant]

[However I'm not a bigot, I hate everyone regardless of race... So I know all the jokes when I want to be particular... Asshole hypocrites who point this out]

What do you call a hundered ragheads at the bottom of the ocean?
A problem.

What do you call a million ragheads at the bottom of the ocean?
A big problem.

What do you call all of the ragheads at the bottom of the ocean?
The solution...

And the cause of human waste shitting up the ocean AGAIN.... [damn you to lucfiers ass raping chamber any religious zealots]... Those poor goats... and children's assholes.

:tbg: :321: :oops:

Can't you tell I like the world today? :wolfgang:

[Mr.LaBella]

Wolfgang, we have rant on and rant off smilies for times like these!

:poke:

:flag::nana2:

[Fenlore]

I think the canadian guy wouldve saved the sess AND booze...AFTER throwing the bastard overboard, :lol: budbuddy.biz

Nah nah nah, at that point the booze might be unrecuable, people can always be thrown overboard.

[SinCity]

Wolfgang,
You are starting to understand the ways of the world. You wish to be part of the Soldiers of Misfortune? I thought I was the only one.
The world has been full of brainwashed fools for as long as I can remember.