SuperD
10-29-2004, 12:12 AM
These chestnuts have been around for a while, but they deserve a re-run.
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things
money can buy."
* Steve Martin
"You know that look women get when they want sex? . . Me neither."
* Drew Carey
"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless
experiences go, it's pretty damned good."
* Woody Allen
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd
better have a good hand."
* Unknown
"If it weren't for pickpockets I'd have no sex life at all."
* Rodney Dangerfield
"My cousin is a homosexual and an agoraphobic. It makes it kind of hard for
him to come out of the closet."
* Bill Kelly
"Bisexuality automatically doubles your chances for a date on Saturday
night."
* Woody Allen
"Homosexuality is God's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't
burdened with children."
* Sam Austin
"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."
* Matt Barry
"Leaving sex to the clergy is like leaving your dog with a taxidermist while
you're out of town."
* Camille Paglia
"Life is a sexually transmitted disease."
* Unknown
"My kid had sex with your honor student."
* Bumper Sticker
"My sexual preference is not you."
* T-shirt
"Computer programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it
the rest of your life."
* Michael Sinz
"Remember, if you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast."
* Woody Allen
"The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishment to
heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals.
It's
just that they need more supervision."
* Lynn Lavner
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal,
particularly in women. Chief among these
is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL convertible."
* Unknown
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
* George Burns
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things
money can buy."
* Steve Martin
"You know that look women get when they want sex? . . Me neither."
* Drew Carey
"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless
experiences go, it's pretty damned good."
* Woody Allen
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd
better have a good hand."
* Unknown
"If it weren't for pickpockets I'd have no sex life at all."
* Rodney Dangerfield
"My cousin is a homosexual and an agoraphobic. It makes it kind of hard for
him to come out of the closet."
* Bill Kelly
"Bisexuality automatically doubles your chances for a date on Saturday
night."
* Woody Allen
"Homosexuality is God's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't
burdened with children."
* Sam Austin
"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."
* Matt Barry
"Leaving sex to the clergy is like leaving your dog with a taxidermist while
you're out of town."
* Camille Paglia
"Life is a sexually transmitted disease."
* Unknown
"My kid had sex with your honor student."
* Bumper Sticker
"My sexual preference is not you."
* T-shirt
"Computer programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it
the rest of your life."
* Michael Sinz
"Remember, if you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast."
* Woody Allen
"The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishment to
heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals.
It's
just that they need more supervision."
* Lynn Lavner
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal,
particularly in women. Chief among these
is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL convertible."
* Unknown
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
* George Burns