GODDESS OF VENGEANCE
11-01-2006, 10:43 AM
After a night of drinking, Timmy crept into bed beside his wife who was
already asleep. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing along flowing white robe.
"Who the hell are you?" demanded Timmy, "and what are you doing in my
bedroom?"
The mysterious man answered, "This isn't your bedroom, and I'm St. Peter."
Timmy was stunned. "You mean I'm dead? That can't be, I have so much to
live for, I haven't said good-bye to my family...you've got to send me back
straight away."
St. Peter replied, "Yes, you can be reincarnated, but there is a catch. We
can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
Timmy was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from
his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light l ater, he was covered in feathers and clucking around
pecking the ground. "This ain't so bad," he thought until he felt this
strange feeling welling up inside him.
The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, "So you're the new hen.How are you enjoying your first day here?"
"It's not so bad,'" replied Timmy, "but I have this strange feeling inside
like I'm about to explode."
"You're ovulating," explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid
an
egg before."
"Never," replied Timmy.
"Well, just relax and let it happen."
And so he did, and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg popped
out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and
his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the
first time.
When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and
he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that had
happened to
him...ever!!!
The joy kept coming, and as he was just about to lay his third egg, he
felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting,
"Timmy! Wake up, you drunken bastard, you're shitting in the bed."
already asleep. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.
When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing along flowing white robe.
"Who the hell are you?" demanded Timmy, "and what are you doing in my
bedroom?"
The mysterious man answered, "This isn't your bedroom, and I'm St. Peter."
Timmy was stunned. "You mean I'm dead? That can't be, I have so much to
live for, I haven't said good-bye to my family...you've got to send me back
straight away."
St. Peter replied, "Yes, you can be reincarnated, but there is a catch. We
can only send you back as a dog or a hen."
Timmy was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from
his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light l ater, he was covered in feathers and clucking around
pecking the ground. "This ain't so bad," he thought until he felt this
strange feeling welling up inside him.
The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, "So you're the new hen.How are you enjoying your first day here?"
"It's not so bad,'" replied Timmy, "but I have this strange feeling inside
like I'm about to explode."
"You're ovulating," explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid
an
egg before."
"Never," replied Timmy.
"Well, just relax and let it happen."
And so he did, and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg popped
out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and
his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the
first time.
When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and
he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that had
happened to
him...ever!!!
The joy kept coming, and as he was just about to lay his third egg, he
felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting,
"Timmy! Wake up, you drunken bastard, you're shitting in the bed."